I DON'T HAVE TO TAKE MID YEAR PAPERS!!!..Jealous if you want to...i've no choice either...Don't know whether itz a good news or bad news.. Coz i've got an infection in my inner wound....
---> Ya..as i've said..my grandma is now in Singapore..living with my family.. Can't deny that she's nice.. but she and my mum talks so loudly as if they live two blocks away.. No doubt that my neighbours can hear exactly each word that comes out from their mouth.. They talk as if they are quarelling...espacially in the cab just now...Think people outside the cab can hear what they say... Kinda paiseh when they talk so loudly in the public..HAiZ!!~
---> Anyway~~ i'm going on a criuse tomorrow...Star Virgo... Coz my papa say that he wants me to go and relax and hope that my inner wound will heal faster...Envy if u want to again...But damn... I'm going with my mama, my grandma, my father's cousin + his wife and son... WHICH SIMPLY means that i have to go and yin chou (entertain to be exact) them again...Well..don't really like that uncle..
---> Tend to think a lot when i'm at home...coz nothing to do mah... I really hope that some day..i can go out with my friends for a tour overseas...How good can that be?? Hor??
I catch a glimpse of heaven
---> Supposed to meet kahsiang n tangkeng at 1...but as usual...they tmd know how to be late...made me wait n wait n wait...Actually i don't want to be on time one...but i don't want to stay at home and yin chou my relatives....
---> Guess where ks bring me to after we had our lunch...He bring me to see flowers and see fishes at heartland mall that area~~ HAhaA~~ We walked for like 1hr ++...Then he bought some guppies home...Actually he wanted to buy water lily..but too eXpensIve le... Was darn tired after that lor...
--> Went Raffles City for my father's cousin's son's graduation exhibition...Wah~~I feel so hypocritic ~~ Have to act si wen and act ladylike again~~ya..He just graduation from Raffles Laselle Institution....and he got a honour degree for visual or multimedia duno what what what one..the name too long le..cannot remember..
---> Anyway~~ think my condition worsened these few days...can sort of feel it myself... Always feel very unfortable... And their blood discharge...Haiz~~~ hope itz just because of pms... And i'm going to SGH for consultation tml..wish me good luck...
---> Very tired today...Gonna sleep soon...And i DIDN'T touch ANY revision for the past two days....And the worse is i don't feel guilty at all!! PREPAREd TO FAIL!!!
I catch a glimpse of heaven
---> Went Taka again yesterday for dinner coz my father's cousin came from Shanghai...i cannot really catch their accent so very difficult to communicate~~Haiz~~ duno how to describe xia~~ Was so bored during the dinner...Its like..everyone's so ke qi..'nvm, u eat'... 'nvm lar..u eat'... 'nvm i'm full already'...OH PLEASE LAR~!!!And can you imagine, i have to act si wen the whole time...DIAOZ right? So xin ku acting guai.. Then now the couple is living in my house..in my room...so...how am i suppose to study? And my ah-ma is coming to Singapore few days later also.. HOW???
---> I'm really bored today~~ nothing to do... and itz only 2.30pm...feel like going out..but my tummy seem to disagree...Feeling more pain these two days~~ So shall rest today~~ Maybe studying with yh n gwen they all tml..anyone wanna join us?
---> Anyway...Went shopping with my sister yesterday afternoon~~ think she changed a lot(in my opinoin) after she started working~~ To me....We can't chat like how we used to chat..Her interest changed too..and they seem to differ so much from mine--She loves soccer and ASSUMES i like too.. and will talk to me about the EURO'04 like nobody's bussiness... Well..fine..i just listen lor~~ And she always want things done her way, she feels that her instinct is always right and doesn't listen to others..Fine with that too...She became more materialistic too..Getting things that are darn expensive when we actually can get the same product(ya, of couse itz a different brand) at a cheaper price..and thinks that we are very rich..Fine with that too..since it doesn't really affect me, itz not my money after all... But when we're at home, she sits there and wait for things to happen..and loves ordering me around...Just because my mama was busy doing her stuff and have no time to help her sew the buckle back to her skirt, she immediately gave a black face and stomped away and slammed the door~~ WHAT THE HELL...can't you just sew it back yourself...?!~! Just because you live in the hostel doesn't mean that we are expected to serve you like a princess at home~~ Itz not that she doesn't help out in the chores at home at all, but she'll grumble after a while... Its like how much chores she do must be matched up by others..If not she'll feel lugi and will not help to do.. What the hell..this is your home lor~~ can't you just contribute a little more...!!! Well..FINE...i can still tolerate this..And what is the worst...? She woke me up early in the morning at 6+ to ask me whether her dressing suit her NEW shoes.. WHAT THE F***.. It's like, mid-yr's round the corner..i just slept 2+ hours ago from mugging...And there u are, waking me up to ask me such a 'constructive' question... duno what to do lar~~ so difficult to please her~~ My house's people is so difficult to please.. They can just give a black face anytime, anywhere, as and when they feel bu shuang...I've tried to be understanding...Just continue to smile when i least felt like...Just don't want to make the whole situation gloom-ier at times...Feel like a hypocrite, but what to do..???
Hee~~ saw this quiz somewhere duno where...just try lor~~ think itz totally crap..but can't admit that it entertains me espacially i'm SOOOOOOOOOOO bored...
yuen-xinxin
Look out for the |
m
HOLE |
From
Go-Quiz.com
I catch a glimpse of heaven
--->Help!~! I'm really going crazy le... I'm totally stressed out.. I'm really trying to mug hard and I still got A LOT A LOT of work to revise~~ I haven't touch physics at all + haven't study market structure + macro + only studied 1/4 of maths... I thought i was progressing very well this morning until just now at around 10++.. There are SOoOOO mouch noise pollution arsing from:
1)My neighbour's renovating her house
2)Bowen's military band is having their training
3)My father's duno who is coming to my house to stay so my mama and the zhong dian nu yong is practically da sao cu-ing the house and is making sooo much noise...
--->How to study like that? My mama is walking in and out of my room and there is so much noises around~~ I've tried to shut myself and stuff my ears with loud music...but it doesn't work...Really want to go out and study~~!!! Anyone interested going out with me and study somewhere esle to study? Quick contact me k...
The more noises there are, the more i'm pissed off
The more i'm pissed off, the more i cannot concentrate
The more i cannot concentrate, the more work is not done
The more work is not done, the more i panic
The more i panic, the more i'm stressed
The more i'm stressed, the more badly i'll perform during midyear
The more more badly i'll perform during midyear, the more i panic...
Well...the cycle goes on i guess...How to go University like that? HAIZ~!~
I catch a glimpse of heaven
---> Went to SGH for follow up yesterday~~ Dr Weber Lau (my surgeon) went overseas for some meeting~~ so i was supposed to see Dr Henry Ho.. But last minute he was on some conference leave too...Then this Indian Doctor,supposingly a consultant, Dr Was De Silva attended to me...Doubt his professionalism man~~ Maybe his eyes got problem, cannot see my wound~~Coz he need to scan my kidney mah~~ then he just use the damn roller and rolled over my wound~~ He used force sommore~~ Then after that i requested to extend my mc coz mine expire le~~ Then he say need mc for what? Hey, excuse me, I can't even sit or stand straight and walk properly, How the hell am i going to carry my school bag and go to school .. Who knows what will happen in school? People might just knock into me... He don't even understand the situation at all~~ Then after that my mama told him that she wants me to rest more..so he mian qiang de gave me 10 more days of mc..which is till 25th of june~~ Damnit..my 1st mid-year paper starts on 26th...
If i were to take the mid-year~~ i confirm get 3 Fs and go for intensive + meet parents session...Somemore will be disheartened by the results.. Since i can foresee the results le, den might as well dun take lor~~ My mama say she go n help me extend my mc when Dr Henry Ho comes back~~ Meanwhile...i'm still trying to mug hard in case my mc really cannot extend le....but guess what~!~! My neighbour is having some renovation or something~~ Whole day got drilling and hammering noises~~~ NOISE POLLUTION!!!! HELP~~ i can't concentrate!!!!
How do I tell him what's really in my heart?
How will I know this won't tear us apart?
How do I know things will turn out right?
How do I show him what I feel inside?
How will I find out if we could be more?
How do I know if this is what I'm praying for?
How can I say the 3 most beautiful words?
How can I speak to him... if I'm not even known?
==== Him? who/which is the him in the first place....I'm not sure ====
I catch a glimpse of heaven
---> Gwen, Yanhui and Deanna came to my house to study today~~ but Deannna left at abt 1.30 to meet her friends for movie i think... Ya...So hardworking right? We were studying the tv from 12 to around 3pm.. Watched the videos; Watched SR vs NY , SR vs PJ and Malaysia trip de basketball matches and the big walk video also... Thought we can finally settle down to study at 3+.. but ended up laughing most of the time~~ We just crap all the way~~ actually we were not even crapping lor~~ we just laugh and laugh.. Then i found out that these group of friends are really amazing~~ They
LOVE talking to themselves and to non-living things in my house... Firstly, Deanna like talking to my house's telephone..as in talking to it and not using it to talk and guess what...She even dismentled it.. Ya...She's good man~~ Then for Gwen, that's really some problem with her today...Keep talking to herself and making all those funny noises and faces...She talked to the television, the sweets etc etc.... And she kept vandalising our lecture notes~~ And yanhui and i had the honour to witness her do the dance pose in the school magazine with our own eyes~~ hAhaA... And as for Yanhui, she asked the plastic bag in my room to keep quiet~~ Then she talked to my fishes... Then she told me that she's very tempted to fry them and eat~~WaH~~this yanhui ar~~ dangerous..i have to protect my fishes when she comes next time~~
---> We were designing our basketball polo-tee just now~~ Came out with a few designs... Hope everyone can compromise with it...ya...
I catch a glimpse of heaven
---> Just came back from dinner with my parents and my uncle from Australia~~ Glad that i can go out...but i still can feel the freaking pain inside my stomach ... When can i recover? HaiZ~~ You know how tiring is it to sleep only on your back .. Only one pose..Cannot toss and turn at all, cannot sleep sideways.. The reason why i wake up so early in the morning is because i sleep until backache.. Haiz~~
---> Anyway~~ You know what my uncle brought all the way from Australia for us... Can you imagine how shock i was when he opened his luaguage? He bought a whole carton of FRUITS here... I think itz in the genes lar~~ You know what my grandma gave us the last time she came to singapore and visit us? She brought those dried vegetables, dried mushrooms, and even wanted to bring fish lor~~ UNBELIEVABLE right?
--->sometimes really cannot stand my parents... They have to talk SOOOOOO loudly even they are at home..as if our house 1000000 feet like that... sometimes what they say is really no link one leh...And sometimes they contridict themselves also...Really can vomit blood and die when i talk to them..Haiyah~~ Whatever that is..i still love them as my parents...No choice i guess~~
---> Anyway..Grace took off her bands le..She called me the day before.. Chatted quite a while before my mama started nagging agian~~ Very glad to be able to hear her voice... but can tell that she can't really exercise her mouth well... Think she's going clubbing on 18th... *heump* i cannot go~~!!! My mama sure dun allow~~!!!! NO LIFE~!!!! ARHHHHH~!!!! Think i'm blogging crap~~ so better stop here~~
====Still trying hard to forget him====
Forever I will think of you
Forever I will care.
Forever I'll remember
All those times we shared.
I've tried to forget you
But I couldn't dare;
Although you broke my heart;
In the broken pieces,
you are still there...
Forever is too long a time.
I have to accept you are no longer mine.
Will forever one day end?
Will my torn heart ever mend?
I hope one day I can say...
Forever just finished- yesterday!
I catch a glimpse of heaven
--->Ok...another rotting day i guess~~ Don't be surprise if i grow horizontally when school reopens... Haiz~~
---> Just watched nba finals...It was game 3...And detriot won lakers~~ YEAH~~ 88-68.. It's not that i like detriot pistons..itz just that i don't like Lakers...HAHA~~ But honestly..Pistons really got darn accurate shooters like Billups and prince.. And pistons really got the teamwork lor..They never fail to backup each other~~Then their centre is really big ~He's those type who tie his hair like Nigerians that type~~ Then he let down his hair this match and he played with his bao za tou~~look really funny, but he's good lar~~ He's big yet agile~~
---> My hands are getting really itchy~~ but don't think i can even run for at least one more month~~ Haiz~~ Don't think i can play for interhouse and alumni~~ ? Sounds like basketball is my motive for going to school and studying is my part-time job huh? Wad-ever..i'm just too bored, so i'm crapping~~
Shall go and continue to rot le...
To all those who wish to be rich tai-tai~~ please read~~
HAHA~~ ~~ Funny~~ and yet true~~
TAI-TAI.
job duties: start as many affairs you can,order the ten maids around the huge tanglin pent house around,travel,show-off,rot, manicure, high tea, shop for branded material and empty the bank account.
When u decide to resign just hire a PI cos yr husband probably cheats on u too and sue! get half of his assets and find another sucker who will believe your sob story.sounds such a fun occupation.
I catch a glimpse of heaven
---> Took out the staples on mon.. surprisingly i felt better after that... so i thought i was recovering fast... but yesterday the wound start to have yellowish discharges... YuckZZ!! My mama said that the back part of the wound is a bit opened~~ And the pain in my lower ab is spreading~~ If this were to continue..think i have to go back to SGH for check up again~~ haiz~~ hope everything's gonna be alright... I doubt my mama will let me step out of the house..not even going to the mama shop just downstairs to get some junk food...
---> Everyone's going for holiday.... Jasmine's going to Sabah this Friday, Siewfong's going to M'sia for her cousin's wedding also on this Friday..Sylvia's going to Japan if i'm not wrong..etc..etc... And i? Going around the world to find zhou gong every now and then... Izzit i xing fu?? So exciting right?.....Anyway~ Hope they'll have a enjoyable trip..
I catch a glimpse of heaven
---> Siewfong came to my house to studee yesterday.... Didn't really studee much~~ got lar~ but a bit only lor.... We were not in the mood of studeeing...sooooo.... ended up chatting and gossiping again lor~~ Hopefully she and him will zhong cheng juan su soon coz they are really progressing super slow lor~~He really like block like that..but think he is a good guy after all, heard quite a bit about him lar~~ And i heard that Yuanyu and her class ok le...Hopefully they wun quarell again lor~~ Siewfong is one of the friends that i've never regretted having~~ Although we have our other cliques in school, but we'll have so much to talk about when we're together.. And she's not hypocrite lor and she knows how to zuo ren..
Ya....and we were talking about one of our friend who have drifted away from us... We were thinking of ways to keep that friendship but we really don't know what to do... Its not our fault after all...You'll be surprised if u know how many people actually dislikes her...
---> Suddenly felt that i'm very kan chiong with my mid-year~~ Realised that i actually have a lot of catching up tutorials and revision to do... I've been told by the principal that if I can't catch up with my work because of the operation...She'll reserve a place in SR for me next year...And my parents told me that itz ok if i cannot make it this year..they won't mind if i study for another year.. BUT i really don't want something like that to happen..Cannot imagine all my friends are already in University and i'm still stuck in JC suffering~~ Espacially when your cliques are not there anymore and you have to adapt to a whole new bunch of classmates, friends and teachers... Haiz~~ So i tell myself that the more i should study harder and not use the operation as an excuse for my lousy results...Haiz~~
====came across this while i was readin one of my friend's blog====
You'll never be free till the day you learn to let go,
Only till that moment you'll finally live ur life again
Open ur arms, let ur tears fall, submit ur life to fate
Dun complain, dun grumble,
Juz walk it thru once n for all.
====
I catch a glimpse of heaven
---> Finally managed to step out of my house after rotting at home for 5 days~~ So happy~~ Somehow felt freed like that~~ went taka for dinner to celebrate my papa's birthday which is only 2 days away~~ I'm soooooo full now~~ My stomach haven't felt so contented for a long long time~~haha
---> Kinda look farnie just now... Think i look like a taitai like that...I can't walk fast mah~~ den i scared kena knock by people mah...so my sis was like holding my hand..like lao fuo ye like that...HAHA~~ My wound is still pain lor~~ so cannot blame mah~~
---> Anyway~~ going to take put the staples tml~~ quite scared really~~ got 24 of them leh~~!!Haiz~~~
= How can this be?? Dun wanna step into it again!! =
I catch a glimpse of heaven
--->Another slacking day~~ did nothing but eat sleep and watch tv.....when will i recover? I'm dying at home~!!! Luckily TangKeng came to visit me today.. Chatted for quite a while and found out how some of my secondary school cliques are doing.. Shock to hear what some of them are doing...
---> Was just reading gwen, grace, jasmine, ruiyi, deanna ...........everybody's blog~~ happen to read some of their feelings when they visited me...Then i got a sudden blast of feelings and tears just flow...I don't know why but i'm very emotional after the operation... Many of them said that they are very heartbroken and stuffs when they saw me after the operation. I'm really thankful to have them as my friends....REALLY!! Have you imagined how life would be if your best friends aren't there to share your joy and sorrows? Nobody encourages you in your darkest times.. Nobody's there to share the gossips and fun in school? There is a saying-- 'you will know who are your true friends are during your darkest times' Well...I know who
YOU are...~ really want to thank you guys who helped me survive thru my 2 years in JC...I wouldn't have 'lasted' so long in this boring jc life if you all wasn't there...
= Gwen = Yanhui = Renee = Yanyan = Jasmine = Deanna = Huili = Joan = Ruiyi = Carmen = Ena = Siewfong = Meishan = Zixuan = Mingkian = Padma = Ruoling = Johnson = Mingkai = Gary = and lots and lots of them...I'm sorry if i have missed out anyone of you....
---> Gwen and Yanhui went out today and gwen msged me saying that they are actually plucking their eyebrows...Was really shock to hear that...Hopefully i can see them soon...Miss them lots!~ Heard that they took some neoprints too..sounds like i've missed out some fun again......Hope i'll recover soon!!
---> Grace's having her operation today...hope everything will be fine for her... Will pray hard for her..
I Don't
by JULIE ANN MALLETT
I don't want to look into your eyes,
you will just deceive me with your lies.
I don't want to let you into my heart,
you will just tear it all apart.
I don't want to look at you and smile,
you will just make me cry after a while.
I don't want to say, "I love you,"
you will just laugh and call me a fool.
I don't want to give you any part of me,
Please just leave... and let me be.= Promised to let go of him...I thought i could... =
I catch a glimpse of heaven
--->HaHa~~after a week of torture...I'm FINALLY home~~ Ya..i'm discharged today~!! Feeling ok now~~ but still feel pain~~ ITZ finally over after countless sleepless nights ~!!!! Horrible experience~~!!!
= 28th May (fri) =Itz finally the day~~ At around 12+, changed into the operation clothes and i was 'drived' to the surgical area~~ Waited for around 2 hours at a super cold room before proceding onto the surgical table~~ The moment that i was put to sleep was unforgettable~~ Itz like...u can hear the doctors talking, the movement of everything, but the world starts spinning.. and it was getting harder and harder to blink..Then........
The next thing i know is...it'z over~!!!
I FINALLY SURVIVED!!!..I could hear my sis's voice but i was too tired and i sort of couldn't open my eyes~~ I only could feel that i'm kinda tangled in a pool of tubes...
= 29th May (sat) =Woke up in the morning to find out that i was tangled up by 5 tubes~~ 2 from my left hand, one to provide oxygen, one sticking out from my
18cm wound to drain out the dirty blood and one to drain my urine~~ YucKzZZ~!! Felt so tied down and basically i couldn't move...Anyway~~ do you know how my wound was stitched? Use string? Noooo~! High tech in the 21st century arh... They use staples to seal the wound up...and i've got like...let me count....1,2,3,4,.........24..~~!!
Ya..24!! Going to take them out next mon...don't know how itz like...maybe it feels like plucking a staple out of your finger? Ouch!!~~ SCARED!!!~~
Luckily deanna, dearie gwen, renee, yanhui, grace, jasmine,ruiyi, joan, yuansze and pohshan came to visit me...Felt so good to see them again...somehow felt relieved when i saw them...They came in 2 by 2...but when ever the door is open..you can see the whole group of them waving to you from outside~~I was so greatful that they were there~~!! Itz a pity that i couldn't really talk that day and i was super tired from the morphine i took.. My throat felt burnt from the tubes that the surgeons put in during the operation and i really took much effort to talk to them~~! They left after a while coz i was really too tired to talk anymore and my eyelids were too heavy for me to lift~~!!
= 30th + 31st + 1st May/Jun =--->SlEePiNg AnD SlEePiNg AnD mOrE sLeEpInG!!! didn't do much things but to sleep and sleep~~ Don't know why lar~~ but was super tired.. Chingwen, Sylvia, MeiShan, Mingkian, jason, Daniel, Jianli and Zixuan came to visit me on Sun!!~~ Thanks!! Really appreciate it~~ If not for you all..i would have been bored to death...
--->Padma, Ruoling, Xinying, johnson, mingkai, tri + cat, jiayin, Dex came to visit me on Sun..bot me a super cute beanie doggy!!! It accompanied me thoughout the night i spent in the hospital~~ Thanks~~
--->Gwen and Ena came to visit again on tue~~ hehe..so glad that u all were there to accompany me watch nba..haha~~~ Dearie Gwennie..thanks hor...Then came Gary, Meihui, Zhengyang and Minglong... Coz my jing shen was much better already..i managed to crap with them until 7+ in the evening before they left..haha...
--->Well...quite late now ...my mum's nagging me to go to sleep again~~ya..before i forget...++ To grace: i've been thru it...and trust me..u can do it too!! Everything will be just fine and before you know it, everything will be done smoothly~~ No doubt that you are feeling very uncertain now..but itz already all laid out... Don't worry too much~~
=====Well..thanks to all those people who suppoerted me no matter whether you went to visit me a not~~ i bet your prayers was heard and soooo...i'm here blogging again~!!! Really appreciate all those care~!!!=====
I catch a glimpse of heaven